I don't even want anything I was desperate to have anymore... I feel too tired... I couldn't handle it if he decided he wanted me after all... I want my dreams to remain dreams and I want my life to be my life and not some series of silly scenes I invent to escape from reality... everything gets all mixed up in the end... I can't swim and I won't learn to swim in the near future, all I can do is float...
So screw it all, I am going to Brighton!!!
Peace!
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